Thoughts Unspoken
by jaejae-jurate9533
Summary: Vampire Bella wants revenge on the guy that killed Charlie, on her way she tries the Cullen's style of diet, and falls for the handsome Edward of course . But will this story really ever have a happy ending? Edward/Bella
1. Dead and Gone

Chapter One

Dead and Gone

I couldn't remember how it happened, maybe I jumped off a cliff, and maybe I fell down the stairs, being as clumsy as I was. The next thing I knew all I could feel was the strongest pain I had ever felt in my whole life, and I had felt a lot of pains. But this pain was so unbearable. I didn't know if I was screaming, maybe I was. All I could think of was Charlie, and what it would do to him if I died.

Luckily, I could feel my slow heartbeat through the pain that was ripping me from limb to limb. I clenched my fists as another surge of pain soared through my limp body. The pain was so unbearable, I would prefer getting painfully killed; maybe this was it, than to this horrible, horrible pain.

I don't know how long I lay there, in that horrible pain, but it started ceasing. I was surprised as the burning left my face and was moving slowly, but surely down my body. I was audibly wincing as it went down to my fingers and moved down my legs, which has experienced so much damage. I could feel all of the boned in my body miraculously healing, what was happening to me?

As the pain eased on my legs, and left my toes, I could feel my last staggering heartbeat fade, and slowly I opened my eyes. What I saw I wasn't expecting. Well, obviously I was expecting to be on a bed, and in a room. But the clearness, I could see every individual pixel so clearly in front of my eyes. As I jumped I wasn't expecting the speed, and the unclumsiness that usually followed a jump like that. What has happened to me?

I looked down at my self, nothing seemed different, I was wearing the same clothes, but when I looked at my hands I let out a gasp. The paleness was shocking, and now I noticed the rustling of the leaves just outside, the footsteps of people outside, and the heartbeats of everyone. "Charlie?" I called, it seemed as f it was someone else speaking, the musical bells that reached my now sensitive ears sounded nothing like me. I was worried. I could feel the burning in my throat, and so many scents around me, and the one question was rolling and rolling around my head, now that I could think of more things all at once. What has happened to me?

"Charlie?" I called again, and I could hear his silent footsteps as he approached my room. I was still getting used to my new vision, and as Charlie entered, I noticed for the first time that he was as pale as me. He had a weird scent, but it did nothing to me. He smelled different than the people outside. I wanted to cry, I felt like I was about to cry, but no tears would come out. Since when didn't I have any tears? "Charlie… What has happened to me?" I spoke softly and quietly, not even sure that he heard me, in my now musical voice.

"Oh, Bella!" Charlie almost cried, and as he hugged me he didn't feel as cold as he did before this pain. He un hugged me, and held me at arms length. "I was so worried that you weren't going to wake up." He confessed and smiled at me in such relief, that it hurt to look.

"What's happened?" I asked again, and the smiled went as quick as it came.

"Umm, Bella, I think that you should sit down for this love." He said softly, and I obeyed, without saying a word. "As you have noticed you were in pain for the last three days, and your voice and appearance changed. You can also hear better and see better…" He said, and I nodded my head in agreement to each one. How could he know all of that though? "You just went through a big transformation to become a... a..." And his voice trailed off. I had no clue what Charlie was talking about, and I needed to know. Now.

"Charlie! Just spit it out!" I almost screamed, and gripped his had so hard that he winced. Apparently I was stronger also.

"Vampire." He said, and his head was bowed down, so I couldn't see his expression, or he couldn't see mine. I could feel my eyes widening, as I jumped up from my bed, still surprised that I could move without being clumsy, I went over to my wardrobe and opened it to see my mirror. I was speechless. One part of my mind was still thinking what has happened, even though I already knew the answer, and the other part was just shocked.

The beauty that stood before me was staggering. The long brown hair cascading down her back. The crimson eyes, the mesmerising paleness. That creature in front of me, was not me. I didn't know who stood before me. I made my eyes wonder to Charlie, and just then I noticed that he had those amazing features too. "Charlie..?" I whispered. I couldn't believe that he was a vampire too. He didn't reply to my whisper, though I was sure he heard it. "How long have you been like me?" I asked, and he knew what I meant.

How could I have not noticed his beauty, probably because I was used to it. How didn't I notice the strangeness in how Charlie looked and behaved over the years? He was a bloodsucker, now I was one too.

"Umm, when you were about two." He said, and I wasn't exactly surprised. That's why I never noticed, because from such a young age, I was so used to it. It didn't faze me anymore. But I was a whole other story. In this stupid situation I cracked a smile. I was wondering why I was turned into a vampire.

"Dad," I said softly, I so needed these answers. "Why was I changed into a ..." I couldn't get the word out, I wasn't ready for being a monster yet. But Charlie nodded all the same, knowing perfectly well what I meant.

"You were dying Bells, I didn't want to lose you, and so I decided you could be like me." He gave me a sad smile, and even though his face was wrinkled, and his eyes were crimson, she looked just a sad old man with staggering beauty. I nodded, happy that Charlie cared about me that much, that he turned me into a monster, just to keep me.

"Umm, what's that burning in my throat?" I asked, though I could guess. The more I thought about it, the more it burned.

He smiled. "You're thirsty Bella. You need some human blood in you, being a newborn and such." He said warmly, his voice almost as musical as mine was, his moustached lips playing a know smile across them. I knew that my eyes held curiosity in them, I wondered if I would actually have to kill anyone.

"Um, Dad, will I have to kill anyone?" I mumbled, looking at him from under my lashes, focusing on all of those heartbeats from behind the wall, would any of them lose theirs, by me? The monster that I'd become?

The smile on his lips faded from my clear question, and I knew that the answer was yes. I was screaming inside my head, _'Don't be a monster, you're not a monster, and you don't have to be one!' _ But I knew that there was no different way; it was always known that a vampire fed on human blood, how else was I supposed to survive? To keep my mind off of the burning in my throat, I asked another question, I had to know the answer to it. I just had to.

"Dad, why were you changed into a …?" I asked, not being able to spit out what I was yet. I didn't expect for something like this to be so hard, getting used to being a vampire. Just then, I wondered how much time actually passed since my transformation.

"Bella, this is not the time to talk about what happened to me, now I need to get you fed." He said, with a fatherly look in his eye, which he always had since I was very little. As he stood up, I stood up after him. "We have to go hunt now, so you wouldn't feel thirsty anymore." He said, and I was wondering why was I so normal. Not wanting to go kill a human right the second that I was changed, or try to kill the nearest source of blood close to me. It was all a wonder to me, but hopefully in time Charlie would explain it to me.

I walked through the familiar, but fuzzy, room through the doors into the living room, and then outside. I breathed in, the burning in my throat instantly becoming more unbearable, the excess venom in my mouth flowing freely, I gripped onto the door, I could feel my fingers making dents into the doors. Charlie gripped my arms and didn't let me go, I was struggling, and the scent of all of that blood around me messed with my head. He pulled me, while I kicked, over to the forest near our house. It wasn't sunny, and I could smell the greenery in the air.

Charlie, once again, held me at arms length. "Listen Bella, you must tempt one of those people out there to come with you into this forest. You must not lose control, or everyone will know who we are." I nodded reluctantly, the wheels in my head telling me that I didn't want to kill any of those innocent people walking down the street. I took another breath, and at once regretted it.

I took the few steps that it took for me to the victim filled street, I wanted to kill them all, but the warmness of my now un beating heart not letting me set my self loose. I found the perfect pray; he was walking down the street, in slow steps. I could feel that innocent victim's eyes widen at the sight of me. My new found beauty mesmerising him. He came closer; I wouldn't have to do the chatting up.

"Hey baby." He said, I could hear his heart speeding up as he took my appearance in, I smiled and his eyes widened.

"Hello there." I smiled, my teeth showing, un scarily. "You want to follow me?" I winked, not knowing what on earth I was doing. I tried to contain my venom in, but it was such a struggle for me, I swallowed, and watched as he nodded, finally speechless. I walked forward hearing his footsteps behind me. He was breathing heavily as I took him into the forest, to where Charlie was standing.

I wasn't smiling, as I took him to where I was sure people couldn't hear his scream. "I'm sorry I have to do this…" I said, and walked towards him. He was panting, his feet glued to the ground. His eyes widened as I leaned into his neck, without smelling it and quickly bit my teeth into his flesh. He let out a yelp, but was silenced in a second more. As I sucked, I felt like crying. I didn't want to be this monster. And to think, I didn't even know his name.

As I finished, the burning had ceased, but didn't leave my throat. I walked over to Charlie, a mourning expression on my face. "I feel so bad…" I whispered and Charlie nodded.

"I know honey," He said, rubbing my arm in comfort, "that's life Bella, it's not our fault who we are." He said softly, and I nodded. I knew it was like that, but it didn't stop me feeling rubbish.

Just then, I could hear inhumanly fast footsteps running through the forest. My head snapped up, to see a man. He smelled like no other human. I couldn't hear his heart beat, or his breath. He was definitely one of us.

Charlie stepped forward, "What brings you here young man?" Charlie asked, the guy, who was tall. With long blonde hair, tied at the nape of his neck. The vampire sent a sneer Charlie's way.

"Move out of my way, Grandpa." He said, his musical voice full of menace, and I snarled. I don't know where that came from. "What do we have here?" He asked, looking me up and down. Appraising me with his eyes. I didn't like that looks, it annoyed me.

I felt anger surge through me, at his perverted stare. I jumped onto him, knocking him onto the floor. "My dad is not a 'Grandpa' to you." I snarled in his face. I could see the shock in his face, he definitely wasn't expecting that. I got off of him, a murderous expression on my face. He smiled.

"Feisty, I like it." He said, like trying to tempt a human into coming to him. I threw a disgusted look. "I'm James." He said, introducing him self. I wasn't even going to bother introducing my self; this wasn't a time for niceness.

"I suggest that you leave." Charlie said, in a voice so low, that I wondered if James could hear it.

"What if I don't want to?" He asked amusement in his voice, his blonde eye brow raised. I wasn't taking thus, and as I was to step forward, Charlie put a hand on my shoulder to stop me, and I felt James's gaze back on me. "So you want to fight?" He winked and something came out deep in my throat. I don't even know what I said. He laughed like a maniac, and I glared. I really didn't like this sorry excuse for a monster.

"Leave, young man, or I will make you." Charlie threatened, with a calm voice. It would have worked for me; I would have been quite scared. But it seemed that it had no effect on James.

"H-o-w?" He stretched that word out, like he was talking to a two year old, and finally Charlie couldn't take it. In the next fraction of a second, Charlie was on James, and he was biting his skin. But James was fast, he grabbed Charlie's head and smacked it against a tree. I could hear the crack of the tree. When Charlie got free he grabbed James's waist, and pushed him into another tree breaking it. My eyes were wide, watching the two men fight.

I winched as James hit Charlie audible, and his hands were once again on Charlie's head. This time I could hear the crack that Charlie's head made as James pushed it to the side, with all of his force. The next thing I knew he was lighting a match and throwing it onto the floor. When the fire spread, in about a twentieth of a second, Charlie was in the fire, before I could even yell. I could smell the purple fumes.

"No!" I cried, running to the fire, but the flames were too big. James was gone before I could blink. I had just lost Charlie.

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**Ok, so tell me what you think? Is this story worth continuing? Do you like it? How can I improve. This is a chaptered story, so hopefully chapter two will be up soon. Thank you for reading.**

**Jurate xxx**


	2. Satisfaction

**Chapter Two**

**Satisfaction**

Another thing that I didn't like about being a vampire was not being able to cry. I mean, Charlie's dead, and I'm not being able to shed a tear. So I screamed. That's the only other way that I knew how to let my frustration out, so I screamed at the top of my not working lungs. It didn't really make any difference.

As I made my way through the greenery of the forest, I thought about how I didn't even get to say 'I love you.' to Charlie. The way he was brutally killed, by a man that he has done no harm to, just made by stone insides churn. I wished I had tears, I really did. Now I can't even mourn properly. I felt sick about my self. Who would help me through my state of now? Charlie was the only one I ever trusted, and now he's gone.

I felt murderous. As I ran at my full speed, my thoughts cleared. But I was still breaking trees loudly with my pale hands. I wonder how come no one has come yet, to see what the racket was. To be honest I didn't care. The two things that were on my mind at that moment were; how it was so unfair to kill Charlie in that way, and how to get revenge on that bastard.

I replayed that fresh image in my mind over and over. And the more I thought about it, the more it made me sick. The more I felt like committing suicide, and not living anymore. I was so hurt, and also on my first day of being a monster that Charlie had sacrificed his happiness for. I will never ever, as long as I live, or exist in my case, forgive James. That night I made a promise to my self, that I will hunt James down, and that I will kill him. I didn't care if I died in the process, as long as I got my peace over Charlie, and the way he was killed.

That image again. I felt like murdering someone. I was so angry; I was still shouting bloody murder. I forgot about the burning in my throat, I forgot about my new instincts, and the new image. I forgot about everything except Charlie, and my plans for revenge.

I felt the wind in my hair, and the air in my lungs, and somehow I relaxed a little bit. I slowed down to a fast human walk, and walked through the forest breaking branches on my way. I hadn't lost the anger, it was so deep with in me now, that it was so hard to get rid of.

I hated James whatever-his-surname-was, and I swear to Charlie that I will murder him. I could smell something different, that wasn't forest. Looking up I noticed that it was dark now, how long had my anger taken me for? Twelve hours? Thirteen? To be honest I didn't care, except I was wondering how come I didn't feel tired yet. Maybe I couldn't sleep? That would explain some things. But, now thinking about it, who would lead me? Tell me what to do, that that I wouldn't mess up this whole Vampire thing? I wanted Charlie. It's been only a day, but I miss him so much, it hurts.

The smells got nearer. It smelt like blood, dirt, sweat and people. The burning flared, and I was harshly reminded of who I was. But I had just hunted this morning; I didn't need any more blood in me. Or did I? I didn't know, it was all so weird still. However, I still walked down to where the scent led me. I reached a quick pace, and stopped after about a minute, at the entrance to a huge field. It was like this big stadium, and I wondered where I was. My geographical skills weren't amazing, so I had no clue.

There were about twenty men, and my senses flared, the extra venom in my mouth hurting my teeth. They all smelled so good. Just then, they saw me. Standing in the shadows, it probably looked like I was hiding. One of the men walked to wards me, and I didn't know what to think.

"Hey, you, what are you doing down there?" He shouted, and I thought that I could ask the same question. It was so late, what were they doing there? I stepped out of the bushes, and the man's eyes widened at what he saw, and I was forced back to reality. I was a beautiful monster to humans, everything about me invited them, and then I could kill them. Who thought of life like this? I didn't want to be who I was, but I knew that that was inevitable.

"Just passing, do you know where I am?" I asked confidently, the burning was almost un controllable, so I stopped breathing, and looked at the man expectantly.

"What are you doing here so late love, aren't you scared of the big bad men?" He asked, turning back to his group, laughing, and completely ignoring my question. I didn't breathe; it was as if I could hear the man's heart accelerate, as I took a step towards him, as he took all of me in. It was as if I could hear his heart flutter, the blood in his neck pulsing the soft, warm liquid, but no. I would control my self. If I killed this man, I would have to kill all those other innocents, I didn't want people knowing who I was, and I think that no vampire did.

I didn't breathe, but I answered in the breath that I had saved up. "You are the least of my worries right now." I said, still taking those small steps towards him, and now that he could actually see me properly, he gulped. I smiled, showing my teeth a bit. "So, you gonna tell me where I am?" I asked, using the last of my oxygen, I really hoped that it was worth it.

He just shook his head still speechless, and I could fell the anger rise inside of me. The urge to kill was so strong, I wanted to murder him right there and then, but the memory of Charlie stopped me. I closed my eyes, and tried a little oxygen. It was like being drugged, the most sensational, and tasty kind of drugs ever, and I so wanted to use them. To feel the hot liquid running down my throat, in that half a second, about a million ideas of how to kill this man ran through my head, but the thing that stopped me from killing him, was the sweet revenge of James.

Someone loved him, and if I took him away from them, they would feel how I felt losing Charlie, and I guess it isn't worth doing that to other people, because the pain inside is only just bearable, to get through minute after agonizing minute.

"Thank you." I said, and smiled at him with a little smile, and his breath hitched.

"Anytime." He managed to choke out, staring after me.

I walked at a quick pace and to the road that was just visible from where I first stood. When I first stepped onto the road, I could hear the rush of the city just about half a mile away. I looked around to see that I was out of sight of anyone human, and started running at my full speed. The wind felt good, it felt good to clear my head of all things murder, and blood. I could breathe again.

I slowed down, as I finally reached the town, it seemed kind of small, and there weren't many people around. It was past midnight after all. I walked at a painfully slow pace, towards the centre of the small town, the people giving me weird glances.

After about half an hour of walking or so, there was no one in sight. I passed a reflective window, and stopped to look at my self, the new me. Even though I liked the beauty of what I saw, I hated the monster that was visible in my crimson eyes, my stone pale body. I closed my eyes. Like closing them would change how I looked, I imagined myself different, with dark red hair, and different facial features. I wished that I looked like someone I didn't know, a stranger that I couldn't relate to.

That was only a wish though, it wasn't possible. But, when I finally opened my eyes, a small gasp escaped my lips. The red hair, the features, the lips the nose, the eyes. They were all so different. It wasn't me I was staring at anymore. I shook my head. How was that possible? Was it like vampires had powers or something? Did Charlie have a power?

I closed my eyes again, just to make sure I wasn't imagining things. I imagined my self blonde, with wider eyes and fuller lips. When I opened my eyes, I had blonde hair. I was stunned. I had a power.

The first thing I could think of was the advantage of this for my revenge plans. I could search all over the world for him, make it my one mission in life to destroy him, changing appearance in city from city, and when I finally found him, he would not know who I was. I could kill him or die trying, at least then Charlie could be up there proud of me, of what I'm doing for him. The sweet taste of revenge would linger in the air. I smiled at the cruel thought, of how satisfied I would feel after James was killed. After I got back on track, and tried to tame the monster in me.

I turned from the window, changing my appearance to the red head one, and walking through the lamps in the city. I heard people just then, and wished I hadn't. I didn't want the cruel feelings of killing for blood in my throat, but what I head interested me. A lot.

"_The Cullen's, they're so pale and beautiful…"_

"_They look so beautiful though…"_

"_Do you think that Edward will go to the dance with me…?"_

"_They look so dangerous though, so beautiful but dangerous…"_

"_Their eyes change, to amber to charcoal…?" _

I had enough of listening to that. I walked over to the people, taking in a breath from where I stood.

"Umm, hello." I said, my voice like music, and I could see the girls' eyes widen at the sight. I was far away yet, and they obviously thought that I couldn't hear them.

"Is she one of the Cullen's?" The brunette whispered, and so they must be vampires if they looked like me. I hoped they were. They obviously didn't hunt humans, so how did they survive. That interested me the most.

"How can we help?" The blonde one said, and I smiled at the politeness.

"Do you know where the Cullen's live? I'm here to visit." I smiled, and I could see the frowns on their faces.

"Um yeah, a couple of miles down the road, and some exit one or other. I'm not sure, the path it really grown with grass and stuff." She said, and I nodded, storing the information in my head. I wondered how they knew where they lived. Do they have parties and such, have they settled down? Do they pretend to be human, do they invite humans over? I would find out soon enough.

"Thank you." I said, once again that day, with the last bit of oxygen I had, and stalked off, to look for the Cullen house.

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**Ok, so what do you think of chapter two? I reallt hope you liked it, and please leave a review! I really enjoy writing this, and please tell me if I suck at writing. Also, I know what this is a bit shorter, but I guess it's ok. Tell me what you think. Thank you!!**

**Jurate xx**


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